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Dr. Beth A. McGuire, Shirley Stutson, MFT please read and learn.
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"Allegations of family violence are the weapon of choice in divorce strategies. Lawyers, and paralegals in women's shelters, call them the "Silver Bullet." False abuse allegations unquestionably work very effectively in removing men from their homes and families. "
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What do we know about women who make false allegations?
Wakefield and Underwager (1990) determined that false accusers are much more likely to have a personality disorder such as histrionic, borderline, passive-aggressive, or paranoid. False accusers appear to be highly defensive and rigid, to have poor insight and a tendency to deny personal shortcomings. They tend to be extremely concerned about and sensitive to how others perceive them. False accusers tend to confuse feelings with facts.A woman may “feel” abused or may “feel” the children are being abused, when, objectively speaking, no abuse has actually occurred (Zepezauer, 1994). Wakefield and Underwager (1990) found that:
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The Silver BulletCanadians have a term for a secret weapon in divorce and child custody cases, its called The Silver Bullet or The Silver Bullet Technique. Click Here
Its basically, any abuse allegation that is directed towards the other parent or party that includes physical, verbal, emotional, sexual abuse, or the a false sexual allegation towards one of the children. The latter is so effective that the alleged abuser usually loses all custody and visitation rights. It is so effective because whenever any type of abuse allegations arise it is a serious matter. Especially when there are sexual allegations perpetrated towards a minor. In those cases its an automatic drop everything and get the perpetrator away from the child immediately. I have experienced this personally. At this writing, I am only allowed visitations in a therapy setting; once a week, if my ex decides to bring our daughter to the sessions. My false allegations are not being pursued by CPS (Child Protective Services) because they said it was a custody issue. I thought that I had dodged The Silver Bullet; after all, I am not in jail right now or have any pending charges. But On January 14, 2013 a judge extended the order that I can not initiate contact with our daughter. Even though the allegation is that I walked into the bathroom while she was showering and saw our 14 year old daughter naked was dismissed by CPS. |
Articles on False AllegationsThe Alarming Rise Of False Allegations Of Abuse
From The Love and Iron Project Parental alienation occurs when a parent consciously or unconsciously attempts to brainwash, or otherwise influence a child’s memories, perceptions, feelings, and relationship toward the other parent in a negative, unhealthy, selfish, or destructive way. And this kind of behavior is repulsive enough. But one of the most extreme, and increasingly popular forms of parental alienation arising in custody cases today involves the false allegations sexual or physical abuse against a child in divorce action. And there is a reason for this: it’s a fast and easy way to get your parenting rights terminated and create unhealthy separation between you and your children during a divorce, even as court-ordered child-support keeps flowing. Of Course, this is why within professional circles, false allegations of sexual abuse in a divorce action are commonly referred to as : The Nuclear Option. read more False Allegations:
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Excerpt from an article about the types of parents who file false accusation:
There have not been any sexual allegations but Christy keeps claiming that there is "something" or "some reason" that April is refusing to see me and is afraid of me. Well, Christy, there is. Its the same reason all the other children (4) in your household have limited relationships with their other parent.
[Update: As of October 25, 2012 Christy has made accusations and a report stating that I walked into the bathroom while April was showering. CPS looked into the matter and will not be any charges]
Blush and Ross (1987) and Ross and Blush (1990) have reported on the personality characteristics of the parties involved arising in the context of unresolved custody and visitation. They gathered social, psychological, and legal data from allegations arising in a family services clinic of a circuit court setting in Michigan. They report that information from several years of such cases provides suggested patterns characterizing accusations that are more likely to be false. Important variables are the escalation and timing of the cases, the personality characteristics of the adults involved, and the behavior of the children. They termed the typical pattern when the allegations turn out to be false the SAID (Sexual Allegations in Divorce) Syndrome (Blush & Ross, 1987).
1. The accusations surface after separation and legal action begins. (A few things happened or were happening when the alienation began to intensify. One or all the following could have been the trigger: April had asked to come live with us. April's relationship with Tammy had developed to the point that Tammy was her confidant and her source of counsel and guidance. Mike, Christy's husband, posted a compliment on Tammy's photo. Christy was having marital problems; Mike was having an affair with his ex-wife and according to Christy was abusive towards her.)
2. There is a history of family dysfunction with unresolved divorce conflict and hidden underlying issues. (Absolutely, and not with just the other 2 older children who have had limited access to their children. According to the mother of the 2 younger children (Alienating parent's step-children) in the household, this biological mother is also being alienated from her children. The mother and the sister of the alienating parent both seem to have relational problems with the fathers of their children. The sister has been in high conflict custody fight and has a very limited relationship with their fathers. Christy claims her father used to slap her while she slept and has not had a relationship with her dad.)
3. The female (accusing) parent often is a hysterical or borderline personality or is angry, defensive and justifying. (Even before I was a Marriage and Family Therapist, I have known that there is something wrong with Christy's behavior. The fact that she will alienate her own child from a loving parent confirms it.)
4. The male (the accused) parent is generally passive, nurturing, and lacks "macho" characteristics. (Yep, this is me)
5. The child is typically a female under age eight. (She was 10 when she asked to live with me. She is 13 now.)
6. The allegations surfaces via the custodial parent. (Christy would make accusations and suggestions which April now believes and repeats)
7. The mother takes the child to an "expert" who confirms the abuse and identifies the father as the perpetrator. (Christy has attempted to do this with her therapist and our court-order psychologist. She has partially succeeded with her therapist. Fortunately, we have so much documentation and have shared with the therapist. Therapist seems to be on the fence and not know what is going on due to Christy convoluted assertions the facts and diverting attention from the real issue with false allegations and absurd accusations. The psychologist has issued a report that identifies some of the issues in Christy's household.)
8. The court reacts to the experts information by terminating or limiting visitation.
Ross and Blush (1990) describe three personality patterns they have observed in falsely accusing parents. The first is the histrionic personality. This individual appears anxious, concerned, and nervous and presents herself as victimized by her estranged spouse. She describes herself as manipulated, coerced, and physically or psychologically abused by this spouse and perceives her child as now in danger of victimization from him.
There have not been any sexual allegations but Christy keeps claiming that there is "something" or "some reason" that April is refusing to see me and is afraid of me. Well, Christy, there is. Its the same reason all the other children (4) in your household have limited relationships with their other parent.
[Update: As of October 25, 2012 Christy has made accusations and a report stating that I walked into the bathroom while April was showering. CPS looked into the matter and will not be any charges]
Blush and Ross (1987) and Ross and Blush (1990) have reported on the personality characteristics of the parties involved arising in the context of unresolved custody and visitation. They gathered social, psychological, and legal data from allegations arising in a family services clinic of a circuit court setting in Michigan. They report that information from several years of such cases provides suggested patterns characterizing accusations that are more likely to be false. Important variables are the escalation and timing of the cases, the personality characteristics of the adults involved, and the behavior of the children. They termed the typical pattern when the allegations turn out to be false the SAID (Sexual Allegations in Divorce) Syndrome (Blush & Ross, 1987).
1. The accusations surface after separation and legal action begins. (A few things happened or were happening when the alienation began to intensify. One or all the following could have been the trigger: April had asked to come live with us. April's relationship with Tammy had developed to the point that Tammy was her confidant and her source of counsel and guidance. Mike, Christy's husband, posted a compliment on Tammy's photo. Christy was having marital problems; Mike was having an affair with his ex-wife and according to Christy was abusive towards her.)
2. There is a history of family dysfunction with unresolved divorce conflict and hidden underlying issues. (Absolutely, and not with just the other 2 older children who have had limited access to their children. According to the mother of the 2 younger children (Alienating parent's step-children) in the household, this biological mother is also being alienated from her children. The mother and the sister of the alienating parent both seem to have relational problems with the fathers of their children. The sister has been in high conflict custody fight and has a very limited relationship with their fathers. Christy claims her father used to slap her while she slept and has not had a relationship with her dad.)
3. The female (accusing) parent often is a hysterical or borderline personality or is angry, defensive and justifying. (Even before I was a Marriage and Family Therapist, I have known that there is something wrong with Christy's behavior. The fact that she will alienate her own child from a loving parent confirms it.)
4. The male (the accused) parent is generally passive, nurturing, and lacks "macho" characteristics. (Yep, this is me)
5. The child is typically a female under age eight. (She was 10 when she asked to live with me. She is 13 now.)
6. The allegations surfaces via the custodial parent. (Christy would make accusations and suggestions which April now believes and repeats)
7. The mother takes the child to an "expert" who confirms the abuse and identifies the father as the perpetrator. (Christy has attempted to do this with her therapist and our court-order psychologist. She has partially succeeded with her therapist. Fortunately, we have so much documentation and have shared with the therapist. Therapist seems to be on the fence and not know what is going on due to Christy convoluted assertions the facts and diverting attention from the real issue with false allegations and absurd accusations. The psychologist has issued a report that identifies some of the issues in Christy's household.)
8. The court reacts to the experts information by terminating or limiting visitation.
Ross and Blush (1990) describe three personality patterns they have observed in falsely accusing parents. The first is the histrionic personality. This individual appears anxious, concerned, and nervous and presents herself as victimized by her estranged spouse. She describes herself as manipulated, coerced, and physically or psychologically abused by this spouse and perceives her child as now in danger of victimization from him.
