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Shared (Anon) Stories of Alienated Parents and Children
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This is a compilation of stories of parental alienation found throughout the internet from around the globe. The are heartbreaking but share an eerie similarity in some of the behaviors of the alienating parent, the alienated child, and unfortunately, of the mental health field, and the broken family court systems. Some have more in similarities than others. But the one thing that they all have in common are that they are frustrating, heart-wrenching, and that all the children caught in the middle are suffering.
Hi am currently fast becoming a victim of parental alienation.
First of all I will say this, I am extremely dissapointed that this sort of behaviour is not condemned in the courts.
I know it's hard to prove but providing you as a male or female methodically take notes in diaries, keep text msgs, emails etc and all relevant evidence pertaining to this sort of behaviour I have read court cases won on it.
The second thing you need to know is that it will cost A LOT of money to try and fight this sort of thing in court. Upwards of $50,000.
Here's a little bit of my story so far.
The ex is saying things such as:
Your son doesn't want to see you anymore
He wants to tell you he doesn't love you anymore
He wants to tell you he doesn't want to see you anymore.
And beleive it or not my son is even saying it nearly word for word on the phone to me
Is this something a 6 year old child would really say you ask??
He refuses to talk to me on the phone at all now.
The ex. whispers demands into my daughters ear when she's talking to me on the phone. Fortunately my daughter hasn't quite been turned against me yet but she does say things which are obviously directives coming from the mother.
What the Alienator also does is constantly talk badly about the other parent, constantly belittling them and making out they are a bad person.
My experience is my children are saying: "Mummy said you will go to jail if you break the law"
Mind you I've never had anything to do with police, courts or jail in the past.
I have ALWAYS ensured both my children talk to their mother on the phone and I have NEVER spoken a bad word about their mother to the children when they are in my company
My son is also saying things to me such as,
"I don't have to talk to you if I don't want to"
This behaviour is insidious, mind numbing and and it's purest form, child abuse.
How can one turn their child against the other parent for no reason?
Now that I am a victim of this behaviour, I now know it is as REAL as the air we breath.
Anyone got any stories to tell on Parental Alienation?
Anyone got any tips on how to deal with this?
First of all I will say this, I am extremely dissapointed that this sort of behaviour is not condemned in the courts.
I know it's hard to prove but providing you as a male or female methodically take notes in diaries, keep text msgs, emails etc and all relevant evidence pertaining to this sort of behaviour I have read court cases won on it.
The second thing you need to know is that it will cost A LOT of money to try and fight this sort of thing in court. Upwards of $50,000.
Here's a little bit of my story so far.
The ex is saying things such as:
Your son doesn't want to see you anymore
He wants to tell you he doesn't love you anymore
He wants to tell you he doesn't want to see you anymore.
And beleive it or not my son is even saying it nearly word for word on the phone to me
Is this something a 6 year old child would really say you ask??
He refuses to talk to me on the phone at all now.
The ex. whispers demands into my daughters ear when she's talking to me on the phone. Fortunately my daughter hasn't quite been turned against me yet but she does say things which are obviously directives coming from the mother.
What the Alienator also does is constantly talk badly about the other parent, constantly belittling them and making out they are a bad person.
My experience is my children are saying: "Mummy said you will go to jail if you break the law"
Mind you I've never had anything to do with police, courts or jail in the past.
I have ALWAYS ensured both my children talk to their mother on the phone and I have NEVER spoken a bad word about their mother to the children when they are in my company
My son is also saying things to me such as,
"I don't have to talk to you if I don't want to"
This behaviour is insidious, mind numbing and and it's purest form, child abuse.
How can one turn their child against the other parent for no reason?
Now that I am a victim of this behaviour, I now know it is as REAL as the air we breath.
Anyone got any stories to tell on Parental Alienation?
Anyone got any tips on how to deal with this?
I am a targeted NC mother. I live in Missouri and my 10yr old daughter lives in Houston. I can not even begin to touch, what PA has done to destroy my relationship with my daughter. I found your site, and I want to do WHATEVER I can, my close friends and family too, to help my daughter and all other children and parents. I have a fire in my belly that has finally pushed me to speak out and bring awareness to PA. Missouri is still behind on PA, but my case is now in Harris County, and I am ready to fight for my daughter!
Anonymous from Canada writes:
I finally left my husband, after years of abuse by him. I left with a few garbage bags full of my clothes and nothing more, I had to leave my son, I literally ran out the door to a waiting car to escape. I had been abused, and tormented by my husband for years, I had to escape to save my life and my sanity. I did not want my son to witness any more, and think it was ok to treat women as I was treated, I left broke,destitute, and with no family support, not even a place to live. I slept on peoples couches, and ended up moving in with a girl I barely knew. She helped me, and fed me until I found a job. I had no work experience, but I had taken a course for professional bartending, and landed a job. I was finally free, or so I thought. I was allowed to see my son for the first while, my ex husband thinking he could get me back still, using my child as a pawn to manipulate me, but he soon realized his reign of terror was over, and I would not go back to him for anything. Then the lawyers came into the picture. My ex fought me for three years over custody of my child. He tried everything to take sole custody, and move him across Canada so I would not have access to him. I had to go on welfare for legal aid, and I was so emotionally exhausted, had to go on medication for depression and anxiety. I finally got joint custody of my child, as it should have been right away,not taking 3 years, but I had held up his wedding plans with his new wife, so Im pretty sure she had him halt his legal attacks on me, it was also halting her Honeymoon in Mexico soo... One day shortly after, I phone his house after work ( still a bartender)to pick up my son, for my weekend and, " You arent picking him up, you are a junkie and a hooker, call your lawyer because you arent getting him " Well, that 1st lie cost me six months of waiting to see a lawyer( legal aid) to walk into a room with six lawyers in it, ( still dont know why they were all there ) and 5 minutes of them telling my ex, that he was being unreasonable, and to stop playing games. I could see my son the next day. This happened continually for about 7 more years. I was not only denied seeing him, but I tried to phone him, and was not allowed to speak to him for a month at a time. My son was lied to by my ex, and his wife, said I never called, and never came to pick him up. I was so distraught. This went on until I FINALLY GAVE UP. Just because I couldnt take the games anymore. My ex husband made it his mission to remove me from my sons life.It worked. The wedge that was driven so deep, by him and his wife it ruined our relationship. I kept trying off and on to contact, and see my child, but the damage was done. The lies and brainwashing have taken its toll. I have not missed one Birthday, or Christmas, always sent a gift, and an I love you, how are you. Not once have I not made an effort. I had hoped and prayed by the time he turned 18, he would just all of the sudden "get it" and come around. This was not the case. I made the mistake of listening to other people tell me that would happen, I also listened to them tell me not to bash his dad or his wife to him, and I never did. Mistake. My son is 20 now, and believes all the lies. I have just recently messaged him, and told him I will be sending him the results of a polygraph test I will take, addressing all of the things he has been lied to about. I dont know what other measure to take to try and prove to him, that I didnt do the things he was lied to about. I have had my only child kidnapped emotionally, lied to , and ripped from me as punishment for leaving the sperm donor. I have tried for 13 years to maintain a relationship with my son, and now he wont speak to me. There needs to be some other means to see your children, to get around the liars, to fight the vindictive ex spouse,other than what I have experienced. This has eaten me alive for 13 years, and it is not over still.
I finally left my husband, after years of abuse by him. I left with a few garbage bags full of my clothes and nothing more, I had to leave my son, I literally ran out the door to a waiting car to escape. I had been abused, and tormented by my husband for years, I had to escape to save my life and my sanity. I did not want my son to witness any more, and think it was ok to treat women as I was treated, I left broke,destitute, and with no family support, not even a place to live. I slept on peoples couches, and ended up moving in with a girl I barely knew. She helped me, and fed me until I found a job. I had no work experience, but I had taken a course for professional bartending, and landed a job. I was finally free, or so I thought. I was allowed to see my son for the first while, my ex husband thinking he could get me back still, using my child as a pawn to manipulate me, but he soon realized his reign of terror was over, and I would not go back to him for anything. Then the lawyers came into the picture. My ex fought me for three years over custody of my child. He tried everything to take sole custody, and move him across Canada so I would not have access to him. I had to go on welfare for legal aid, and I was so emotionally exhausted, had to go on medication for depression and anxiety. I finally got joint custody of my child, as it should have been right away,not taking 3 years, but I had held up his wedding plans with his new wife, so Im pretty sure she had him halt his legal attacks on me, it was also halting her Honeymoon in Mexico soo... One day shortly after, I phone his house after work ( still a bartender)to pick up my son, for my weekend and, " You arent picking him up, you are a junkie and a hooker, call your lawyer because you arent getting him " Well, that 1st lie cost me six months of waiting to see a lawyer( legal aid) to walk into a room with six lawyers in it, ( still dont know why they were all there ) and 5 minutes of them telling my ex, that he was being unreasonable, and to stop playing games. I could see my son the next day. This happened continually for about 7 more years. I was not only denied seeing him, but I tried to phone him, and was not allowed to speak to him for a month at a time. My son was lied to by my ex, and his wife, said I never called, and never came to pick him up. I was so distraught. This went on until I FINALLY GAVE UP. Just because I couldnt take the games anymore. My ex husband made it his mission to remove me from my sons life.It worked. The wedge that was driven so deep, by him and his wife it ruined our relationship. I kept trying off and on to contact, and see my child, but the damage was done. The lies and brainwashing have taken its toll. I have not missed one Birthday, or Christmas, always sent a gift, and an I love you, how are you. Not once have I not made an effort. I had hoped and prayed by the time he turned 18, he would just all of the sudden "get it" and come around. This was not the case. I made the mistake of listening to other people tell me that would happen, I also listened to them tell me not to bash his dad or his wife to him, and I never did. Mistake. My son is 20 now, and believes all the lies. I have just recently messaged him, and told him I will be sending him the results of a polygraph test I will take, addressing all of the things he has been lied to about. I dont know what other measure to take to try and prove to him, that I didnt do the things he was lied to about. I have had my only child kidnapped emotionally, lied to , and ripped from me as punishment for leaving the sperm donor. I have tried for 13 years to maintain a relationship with my son, and now he wont speak to me. There needs to be some other means to see your children, to get around the liars, to fight the vindictive ex spouse,other than what I have experienced. This has eaten me alive for 13 years, and it is not over still.